Hello boys and girls, well girls since they are the only ones
currently following my blog. I know it has been over a year since I have
updated my blog. Things have happened in my life that kept me from it.
Here is a quick recap of the last year and a few months. In July of
11' I got a job at Old Navy and at the end of that same month I moved very
quickly out of my parents house into an apartment in the city with my best
friend. I had to move quickly because my parents were moving. I was
in that apartment for over a year and continued to work at Old Navy, even
though it was only supposed to be temporary. I also went through classes
to become Catholic, classes known as RCIA. I was confirmed in the Roman
Catholic church on Easter Vigil this year. (Maria Goretti being my patron
saint.) I had to quit my job at Old Navy at the beginning of September because
I had to move out of my apartment and into my parents new house and it was too
far away from Old Navy and they usually worked me 16 to 20 hours a week and I
got paid barely over minimum wage.
Since then I have been
jobless and looking and of course doubting God and his work in my life.
Now on the same day I quit my job, my two best friends also quit theirs.
One, because she lived with me and had to move as well. The other
it was a complete surprise that she quit. We both couldn't believe that
we quit on the same day. We both had no idea each of us were going to do
that. Fast forward to the week before Thanksgiving. All three of us
were still without work, broke, and didn't know what to do. I started to
doubt very heavily God was working on anything. NOW I must say this,
several months ago I feel that God told me that something big was about to
happen to me, that everything was going to change. I told this to my
friend Brittany and she said she felt the same. I told this to my friend
Jessica and she also said that she felt that way. All three of us agree
that there is going to be a revival in Oklahoma, and you know what??!!!
IT'S HAPPENING! I found this out going to deliverance a few weeks
ago. Gold dust is being seen and people can actually see it on their
skin!
However, two weeks later, I
am depressed. I am oppressed. I am down trodden and down cast.
Last night I stayed in my room and cried for several hours till I fell
asleep. I woke up around midnight in the middle of a dream about the
gorgeous Christian Kane (PG I promise). And for the next several hours I
threw myself a little pity party, watched Whose Line Is It Anyway on YouTube on
my phone, and just thought all about myself and that nothing seemed to go my
way. Then at about six in the morning I just thought, and I think this
was God, "God doesn't want me doing this anymore." No more of
the sinning I am doing that I do not wish to share on here and that I
need to get rid of certain things in my possession that are the complete
opposite of a Godly path. It's time to move forward and ACTUALLY trust in
Him. And my little sister told me a few weeks ago "I just want my big sister and best friend back." I realized I had not been myself and let everythying get me down. (And I want the old happy me back!) That's when a verse popped in my head.
Mark 11:24 Therefore I tell you, whatever
you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.
This popped in my head and I
immediately had to look it up. When I read the words I thought "DUH!
How could I have strayed? I knew this!" So I got up took
a shower and washed away all my tears and my hurt and made some breakfast.
Malt O Meal, scrambled eggs, coffee, and a glass of milk. I have
done two loads of laundry. And even though I am still with out a job,
still broke, still a little worried (it's human) I am putting my trust in
God. God does have big things planned for me and by golly I am ready and
want them to happen to me! I am going to lose the weight I need to, get
healthy, find a home church, and get a job. And you know what? My
God, my friends, and my family will be right there with me!
For those who are a
little confused about me converting to Catholicism and going to Pentecostal
Deliverance and trying to find a church home when I can just go to the nearest
parish to attend mass, I identify myself as both Catholic and Pentecostal;
Pentolic as I like to say. :) I believe in speaking in tongues,
laying on of hands, supernatural events and happenings, and the move of the
Holy Spirit. There are things I get from Mass that I do not get from a
Pentecostal service (namely the Eucharist) and things I get from a Pentecostal
service that I do not get from Mass (namely the spiritual connection and the
sermon being Spirit led instead of a schedule) I can dance, sing, and
literally fall on my face in a Pentecostal service and get a Prophetic word.
I love the Catholic Mass though. The beauty of Christ is in it.
I feel his presence when I partake in the Eucharist (communion). I
therefore need a Pentecostal church home and a Catholic church home. (I
miss St Charles Borromeo!) And God is going to help me.
This may be hard and I
know that times are rough, but with God all things are possible and you know
what!? I am going to pray for what I want and believe that I have
received it! And give God the glory! I pray blessings to everyone
and I hope that you will join me on my journey as I could
use encouragement. I will do my very best to encourage you!
And even if you are not Christian, be it Atheist, Agnostic, Pagan, or
otherwise, your encouragement on following my dreams and continually seeking
will be greatly appreciated. I know you are all very supportive of your
friends so I seek that support!
I would love to
hear from as many people as possible!!! Thanks again!
God
Bless!
Carlena
Here is a picture
of me (far left) and the rest of my brothers and sisters and my mom on
Thanksgiving.
Starting from far
left back row: Me (25), Anthony (26), Momma (I like breathing so no age, lol),
Bill (31), and Dana (30). In the front is Elizabeth (24).
Scripture is copyrighted from the Holy Bible, New International Version.
